This page contains material of an adult sexual nature.
What this book is about
I am a person who believes in reality. My religion is reality as it really is. In fact I started a church called the Church of Reality. It can be found on the Web at http://www.churchofreality.org. I am a nerd, a scientist, and a student of the true nature of things. I endeavor to understand the way things really are, and not the way I would like them to be. What I say here represents my understanding of reality of sex. I believe that the best way to deal with things is to look at reality for what it is and not what we would like it to be.
When you get done reading this book I want you to see results. I want you to be able to tell your friends, "I tried it and it WORKS!"
In this book I am going to explain to you sex the way it really is. The goal of this book is to teach men how to have better sex. This book is written for the average guy like you and I. It is my hope that you can read it, understand it, do it, and see results. When you get done reading this book you should see the results. I want you to be able to tell your friends, "I tried it and it WORKS!"
About the Author
I am a middle-aged nerd who is average looking and a little overweight. There is nothing special about me physically. I'm just another guy like you are. I've always loved to figure things out and understand how they work and women and sex are interesting to me. I do have two unusual talents. I'm very good at understanding things, and I'm very good at explaining things. I've done a lot of investigating and I'm now prepared to share what I've learned.
I started having sex at the age of 18. At the age of 19 I moved to Missouri and was part of the "back to the land" movement. These were hippies who, after the Vietnam War, decided to drop out of society and start communes and live off the land. Most of these people were older than I was, ranging in age from 25 to 45. Hippies didn't have the same sexual inhibitions as most people and most of the women were at the age where women are at their sexual peak. I was like a kid in a candy store.
Being with older women, especially hippie women who had had many lovers, taught me a lot, and I had a great time for many years. Eventually though I left the woods and rejoined the "civilized" world. Being into technology and tired of fixing CB radios for a living, I decided to learn computers and eventually opened a computer retail store.
At the time I started in the retail business I didn't have a lover. I hadn't gotten laid in a long time and it was beginning to bother me. I had a lot of money but not a lot of time and it occurred to me that with a little cash I could solve this problem. So I went to the local whorehouse and took care of the problem.
All I expected was a fairly impersonal fuck, and that would be better than not getting any. What I got was great. I met this woman who went by the name of "Honey". She had that special kind of grin than let me know that she was someone who enjoyed her work. She asked me my name and I said, "If you're Honey, you can call me Sweet Tooth." It was great. This woman knew her job and then some. I quickly became a "regular" and saw her a couple times a week.
Although the hippie women were good, Honey was a pro. This is what she did for a living and besides making good money, she loved the work. For the next 2 years I got a hell of an education about women and sex. I became Honey's favorite customer. The other girls used to tease her about it. They'd make up stories that I'd come in on days when she was off and had sex with them. She'd get jealous and pissed off about it.
One day Honey quit her job and disappeared. I started trying out the others who worked there and ended up seeing a woman who went by the name of "Connie". I got to be her favorite customer as well. Then after about 6 months Honey came back and I alternated between the two. Then Connie moved off to Biloxi, Mississippi, and it was back to Honey and me again.
Around 1986 I got together with the love of my life, or so I thought at the time. Vicki and I moved in together. She moved up from Texas and we eventually got married. Having a permanent relationship, I decided I had to break it off with the hookers. It was sad breaking the news to Honey, but I had always wanted to be married and had my chance to try it out.
Being married was interesting. I made the mistake of mentioning to Vicki the names of some of my ex-lovers who were now friends. Vicki was the very jealous type and went out of her way to sabotage any previous relationship I had. Although Vicki had a hippie background, she was only peripheral to the hippie culture. Only a part-time hippie rather than really living it the way I did.
Like most hippie women though, she had a long sexual history. I was her third husband and she had been with about 25 other guys before me as well as a miscellaneous woman or two. Most women who have had a lot of lovers have tried another woman once or twice. I don't even consider a woman to be bisexual unless she's had more than 20% women lovers. To me Vicki's sexual experience was a plus because I like women who knew what they were doing. And for a "civilian" Vicki was pretty good.
For 8 years I played the loyal monogamous husband role until one day she decided that I wasn't "enlightened" enough for her anymore and she wanted to move on. We're now involved in a long nasty divorce that lasted more than five years. The judicial system is very hostile to good husbands and families and the courts are little more than an organized crime ring for lawyers to steal everything you own if your relationship fails. But that's another book.
After we broke up and she moved out, I went back to the hookers. This time though, instead of going to the whorehouses, I discovered something new -- escort services. They come to your house and you get to do it in your own living space where it's more comfortable. This time instead of seeing one or two women I decided to try out a variety and see lots of different women. Divorce is tough, but it's not nearly as tough when you're getting laid. These women were just what the doctor ordered!
Most guys think they know more about sex than they really do. The good news is that if you learn the basics you will be a lot better lover than you are now. And a lot of the basics are really easy to learn.
I saw a lot of different escorts and I started to notice something. I was getting very good reviews in bed. I was becoming "best customer" to about two thirds of them. Several of them said I was the best they ever had. I had always known I was "pretty good" but didn't think I was that good. Turns out these women weren't kidding. So, being a curious sort of guy I wanted to figure this out, so I started asking questions and got a lot of interesting answers.
After every session where I could tell the woman I was with had just had a great time I started asking what it was that made it so good. What was it I was doing that was different than other men? It seemed that sex was pretty easy and I couldn't believe that I was that great. As it turns out, it's not that I was that great. What I found out was how little the average guy knew. I found out that most guys know almost nothing about how to please women and they are totally ignorant of the basics. Basics I thought everyone had to know.
Most guys think that sex is something that is supposed to come naturally. They believe that they are born with the knowledge to be great lovers. But that isn't the case. Men know enough instinctively to reproduce, but not to really please a woman. These women convinced me that the average guy was clueless. Eventually it became apparent that I should write this book.
Women have assisted me
I've mentioned this book project to many of these women and they love the idea. In addition to what I've learned on my own, I got a lot of good pointers from these women who contributed ideas to this book. So what you read here isn't coming from just me. I've had some help from a lot of women whom I consider to be leaders in the field. Who would know more about what men don't know than women in the business of having sex with hundreds, or even thousands of men?
What I found was that men don't know the basics. What it takes to be a good lover isn't very hard to learn and I believe it can be easily taught. So, you too can be great in the sack and I'm going to teach you how to do it.
Besides not understanding the basics, of what turn women on, I found that most men make a lot of mistakes that turn women off. The biggest area of improvement isn't in learning what to do right as much as eliminating what most men do wrong. Most guys can be a better lover by just doing nothing than doing what they are used to doing. When a woman has sex with you she wants to come. She is capable of making herself come and all you have to do is not mess it up. In this book I'll show you a step-by-step approach to learning how to do it right.
It's not just learning what to do right. It's also learning what not to do wrong. One of the greatest gains you can make as a lover is to stop doing things wrong.
Let's face it guys, they didn't teach us how to fuck in school. Our parents didn't sit down with us and have that "little talk" and tell you how to drive a woman mad. Most guys are too embarrassed to ask and most women are too shy to tell you. Most guys think it's something they should just "know" and that they don't need to be taught how to do it. So you do it and you don't have a clue about what you're doing. Well, that's going to change because I'm going to tell you everything I know and I'm going to continue to add to this book as I learn more.
Web based publication
Unlike a normal paper book this book is a web-based product. It is not limited to having to be done and committed to print. I can add to it and correct it at any time. I am also connecting a web based discussion system to the book so that people who read it can interact with each other and with me and discuss ideas on how to make sex better. As new ideas are presented I will, from time to time, add to the book and make it more interesting and accurate. If you have learned something that the rest of us should know, feel free to share it.
If you read this book and you don't feel like you got your money's worth, I will give you a refund.
I am so confident that you will benefit from this book that if you read it and you feel like you didn't get your money's worth, I will give you a refund. Like Wal-Mart, my policy is satisfaction guaranteed or your money cheerfully refunded. If you're not happy with what you learn here, you get you money back. So with a guarantee like that you have nothing to lose. So get your credit card out and start reading.
Using this Book
In order to explain sex I'm going to start with an overview of reality beginning with the creation of the universe and how life formed on this planet. Sex is about reproduction and continuing life. It's reasonable to assume that activities that lead to reproduction are also going to be pleasurable. Therefore, and understanding of reproduction will give us insight into sexual pleasure.
I will then go over the history of sex, defining what it is, and then go on to talking about what men and women really want sexually. I want to lay the groundwork of a basic understanding of sex from a pure reality point of view. This groundwork in necessary in order for you to understand what you are doing and make it easier for you to practice the learning exercises and get the experience you need to learn how to do it right. This book includes hands-on, penis in vagina experience. If you don't have a practice partner, I have information on where you can rent one.
Once you understand the basics you can move on to the more advanced stuff with a clear understanding of what you are doing and why it works. Ultimately you will learn that a personís most powerful sex organ is the mind. I will teach you the mental disciplines that will drive women wild. To me there's nothing more fun than a woman who's screaming with pleasure or lying next to you afterwards with a big grin and vibrating with pleasure. If you haven't experienced this you need to try it out.
Genesis - The Way it Really Happened
Origin of the Universe
In order to understand sex, we must first understand life itself and the universe we live in, and how life reproduces itself. You may be thinking, "Gee Marc, I'm just trying to get laid. I don't want to start a family. I'm trying to avoid making babies." I understand that. But the biological reason sex exists is to make babies and the pleasures of sex is what compels us to reproduce. So understanding life is relevant to understanding how to fuck.
In the beginning there was quantum gravity. Within a fraction of a second it decayed into the unified field, then decayed into the four forces. For the next 100,000 years space and time expanded and the universe was filled with pure energy. Then energy began to decay into matter and the first atoms of hydrogen and helium were formed.
As the universe expanded and more energy deteriorated into matter, gravitational forces started pulling the hydrogen and helium atoms together. As huge amounts of matter clumped together, heat and pressure rose until nuclear fusion occurred and the first stars were born.
New stars continued to form for billions of years and these stars organized into galaxies as the universe continued to age and expand. As these first stars aged their nuclear reactions created the heavier elements of the universe and after billions of years these stars collapsed in on themselves and exploded in supernovas sending all sorts of the heavier elements out into space.
As these pieces of exploded stars moved through space, gravity pulled them together and they formed second generation stars with new planets orbiting them made of silicon, iron, nickel, oxygen, carbon, and hundreds of other elements. One of these planets was our planet which we now call Earth.
We are a chemical pattern that exists on a speck of dust in the universe for little more than an instant in time.
As the earth cooled, water condensed out of the atmosphere and the primordial seas were formed. Somewhere about four billion years ago chemicals bonded to form early amino acids and eventually organized into virus like organisms that were capable of replicating themselves and for the first time, life existed on this planet.
Over the years life continued to evolve becoming more complex as organisms competed to survive. Eventually organisms started combining with each other and interchanging their DNA. In other words, they learned to fuck. This exchange of DNA allowed these organisms to mutate faster and evolve faster than other organisms that replicated themselves by making an identical twin. As early life evolved, those creatures that developed greater abilities to fuck replaced those who couldn't.
Origin of Sex
Thus, in the early warm seas about 3 billion years ago life began to fuck. And the better they fucked the better their chances of passing their genetics on to future generation of life. So the ability to fuck became a big factor in successful evolution along with the ability to eat, kill, defend oneself from being killed and eaten, and to survive the elements.
After 3 billion years of fucking and evolution our early ape ancestors were roaming the jungles of Africa. A few million years ago the early apes were developing an opposing thumb which gave them the ability to use tools and I suppose for males to jack off. The ability to stand erect helped to cool the brain and allow for more intelligence. Standing upright also allowed for the throat area to develop to allow for more complex noises that eventually turned into vocal communications.
We are the descendents of three billion years of creatures fucking each other. Everything all the way down to plant life wants to fuck something.
The ability to communicate allowed them to share knowledge. This knowledge helped them to survive and those who were smarter and better able to learn and to pass on knowledge to their offspring survived better than those who couldn't. Thus primitive apes evolved into modern humans.
As our brains developed we became self aware and began to understand what we were doing and ask questions about why we are here. We are like other animals in that we fuck just like everything else. But we are now aware that we fuck and know what fucking is and that it is a reproductive process. Only in the last 100 years have we become aware of DNA, genetics, and evolution. Although humans have been breeding plants and animals for centuries allowing man to take control of the evolutionary process to a limited extent.
We are the descendants of three billion years of fucking. Our parents fucked to create us. Their parents fucked to create them. Every generation is the result of the fucking of the previous generation. Everything all the way down to bacteria wants to fuck something. Even plants want to fuck. That's what flowers are. Flowers are the organs that plants use to fuck with. Fucking is the way advanced life reproduces on this planet. Where there is no fucking, life ceases to exist. Life depends on fucking. That's the way it is.
Sex and Evolution
The basic concepts behind evolution are rather simple. Those who survive and reproduce pass their traits on to the next generation. Those who do not reproduce do not pass their traits on to the next generation. Looking back up the family tree, our ancestors were the ones who successfully survived and reproduced.
There are people in history who had the self discipline to give up sex and rise above their animalistic desires. These people however are not our ancestors. Our ancestors were the ones who had no control and gave into our desires. We are the descendents of sluts. Our ancestors were the ones who had the ability to have a lot of kids and to survive. Genetic traits and behaviors that led to reproduction were passed on. Those traits that didn't lead to reproduction became extinct.
Women have an irresistible sexual desire. They need to be fucked. Their vaginas are made to have penises inserted inside them and to feel men jack off and pump semen into them. This is a three billion year old tradition that isn't going to stop now. This is the reality of how things are, and the more in tune you are with this reality the more fun you're going to have. I think the best sex comes from being in tune with the biological reason sex exists in the first place. However, the point to remember here is that if you view women's desires in terms of evolution you can explain a lot of why sexual behavior is the way it is. And I believe that you can predict if something is going to be sexually exciting to a woman by testing it against evolutionary preferences.
Evolution allows us to predict that any kind of sexual activity that makes a woman's body feel like she's getting pregnant is going to feel good to her.
For example, since the delivery of sperm is necessary for reproduction, then a woman is more likely to get pregnant if a man's penis is inserted deep when he ejaculates. Therefore, one can predict that if a man thrusts his penis in real deep when he comes that it's going to feel real good to a woman.
Another example is that when a man ejaculates, his penis twitches in a pumping action. Since this is necessary for pregnancy one can predict that penis twitching and pumping motions should drive a woman wild. And in fact it does. You can insert your cock real deep into a woman and twitch it like you're pumping come into her and she'll usually have an orgasm. Her orgasm helps her uterus gobble up that sperm to get her pregnant. So because it increases the likelihood of reproduction, it's going to feel good.
Masturbation serves an evolutionary purpose. One thing it does is that it keeps us in a sexual mindset. Keeps us mentally ready to have sex. In men it serves a biological purpose in that it helps purge aging sperm so that fresh new sperm can replace them. New young sperm that are more likely to get a woman pregnant. Masturbation has a biological purpose for women as well. It helps expel dead cells for the lining of the uterus so that a fertilized egg can implant in the fresh lining. Those who jack off have more kids than those who don't and thus evolution favors people who masturbate. If our parents didn't play with themselves, we probably wouldn't be here. Think about it.
The Future of Fucking
From a purely technological point of view human life could continue without fucking. With artificial insemination, cloning, gene splicing, DNA sequencing, and other technologies being developed mankind could completely eliminate the biological need for people to fuck. This is a threat to us men who are "only good for one thing" to have our one thing become obsolete. (Although I am also good at opening jars, there are machines that do that too.)
Now that woman have vibrators, and all this new technology, it makes you wonder about rumors that are beginning to surface. I have heard that hidden in the Amazon Rain Forest is an underground group of lesbian cannibal women scientists who are secretly working on the elimination of men. The story is that are developing a genetically engineered virus that they are going to release into the population that attacks men only and leave a society of women who will populate the planet and the human "Y" chromosome will become extinct.
If we don't learn how to fuck, the women are just going to have us killed off.
I know it may sound crazy, but it could happen. What if it was true? Technologically it will soon be possible. What does this mean? What it means is that if we men don't learn how to fuck, we risk the possibility of extinction. I am trying to save the lives of all men everywhere and I implore you men to join the effort to prove to these women that we can compete favorably against vibrators and to influence the lesbian scientists in the Amazon jungle to not release their genetically engineered virus and wipe us all out.
What is Sex Really?
The Mystery Revealed
Sex has been shrouded in mystery. What is it? Is it sacred or is it sin? Should we do it or shouldn't we? Who should we do it with? Should we do it with just one person? Why do we enjoy it? How can we enjoy it more? How is sex related to love? Is it wrong or is it right? How can something so necessary be wrong? How can something so undignified be so right?
Animals don't have these problems with sex because they don't have the ability to ask questions. Animals just have sex. They have no choice. It's instinct. It's what they do. It's what they have been doing for the last three billion years. The animals who didn't have sex failed to reproduce and became extinct. A species ability to survive depended on its ability to fuck.
But what about people? We're not mere animals are we? Are we not somehow higher than the animals? Are we not somehow above mere fucking? Surely there are some differences between us and the beasts isn't there?
To best understand sex we have to put aside our mythical and religious views and get down to the fundamentals. Once we know what sex is and why we do it, we can better understand how to do it right. I am now going to have that little talk with you about "the birds and the bees" in a way you might not have heard it before.
The closer you get to the biological reproductive instincts that we all have, the hotter the sex is.
The primary reason for sex is having babies. That is what sex is for. So yes, we are like the animals. And when it comes to sex we are more like the animals than anything else we do is. Sex is not optional. We fuck because we have to. It's instinct. We are beasts in a world of beasts and we fuck because our parents and all our ancestors did. And we will have children and they will fuck and have children. And that is the basis of what sex is all about.
We are male and female. Our bodies are designed for sex. A woman has a vagina for a single reason; to receive a cock and cause him to ejaculate in her so she will receive his genetic material, become pregnant, and have a baby. Our bodies are designed to accomplish this and that is the biological goal behind sex.
You might now be thinking, "Come on Marc! I don't have sex because I want babies. I have sex for fun." Yes, that's true. In fact sex is so much fun that you can't help but to have it. If sex weren't so much fun we wouldn't be doing it and if we didn't do it humans wouldn't be around very long. Sex is fun because if sex weren't fun, we wouldn't be here.
Where I'm going with this reproductive talk is that if sex being fun is necessary for human life to continue, then it's logical to assume that the more you understand the reproductive process the more you'll understand how to have better sex. Since sexual pleasure is the driving force behind reproduction, it would seem that activities that allow the body to think it's reproducing would create the most sexual pleasure.
For example, years ago I was with a hooker named Honey. One day I asked her, "How would you like to do something kinky?" "What?" she asked. "Well, I wouldn't want to embarrass you." I said with a big grin on my face. Honey started pounding on my chest grinning and said, "Tell me. Tell Me." So I said, "Let's pretend we're a married couple in love and we just decided to have children..." She loved it! Damn that was hot! It's not the kind of fantasy that most men have with sex workers but what it taught me was that getting down to the fundamentals of sex allowed me and Honey to experience a higher level of sexual pleasure. Although you don't have to have the "I'm going to get you pregnant" fantasy to be a great lover, I do think that knowing that her instinct to get pregnant is the biological bases of her sexual desires and the more you can harmonize with those instincts the more sexual pleasure she's going to experience.
It is my view that good sex comes in part from an understanding of the basic biology, physiology, and psychology of human reproduction. Knowing how men and women think, what their needs are, what their sex organs want, how their minds are programmed, and how the body parts physically work are the important basics to becoming a great lover. Once you know the rules of the game you can then learn how to play the game on an expert level.
Sex and Love
There's a complex relationship between sex and love. Sex and love are not the same thing. The older I get the more I realize that sex and love are very separate things. Sex is almost purely biological. Masturbation, for example, has nothing to do with love. We are sexually attracted to people based on how they look to us. Sometimes it's the smell that does it. Some little thing that gets our attention and makes us want to share some genetic material with that other person.
Love, on the other hand, is caring about the other person. About who they are and how they are doing. One can be in love without any sexual contact. Which is how it usually turns out for guys like me. Love is about dreams, poetry, romance, and building lives together. Sex is about getting your rocks off.
Many people believe that sex is best when there's love. Some people think that it isn't right to have sex without love. Some people think that sex without love is empty. I don't agree. I think that sex and love are independent and romantic sex is just one of many styles of fucking. Not to put down either sex or love, but the assumption that one is necessary for the other is a mistake.
In fact, I think that sometimes love interferes with good sex the same way that love interferes with honest communication. Because you love the person you're afraid to get really sexual because you might think they might find out what a sex pervert you really are and not like you anymore. Love raises the stakes and makes people want to play it safe sexually and not risk getting adventurous. Love can sometimes lead to inhibition.
Sometimes love creates so many complex emotions and issues that it can actually interfere with the sex.
Just because people love each other doesn't mean they trust each other. And it especially doesn't mean they trust each other sexually. Once you're in love you have to deal with the trust issue because you risk loss if your partner changes her mind. That's what being jealous is all about. Love creates so many complex emotions and issues that in many cases it actually interferes with the sex.
In order to get past your inhibitions you have to develop sexual trust with each other. You have to realize that your lady is a complex person. Sometimes she's the sweet little innocent flower you fell in love with, while at the same time she's like a cat in heat. Mentally you have to be able to accept and appreciate her as a sexual being, that as a human that is part of her nature. And you have to want to let her express that part of herself. If she doesn't feel safe and comfortable with you, she'll never share with you what she's sexually capable of. Not that she doesn't want to, but she can't. You have to be able to allow her to be as sexual as she wants to be. And that takes some mental training.
There is a lot of mythology in our culture about sex, love and the way relationships are supposed to be. Sometimes we find the "right one" and live happily ever after; sometimes we don't. There isn't just one "right way" to find satisfaction in life. There are many right ways and what works for you is not necessarily what is going to work for someone else. If you buy into the mythology that virgin marriage monogamy is the only right way and you're 40 and still looking for your virgin, there's a good chance you're not going to get what you want. The more open you are to other options, the more likely you are to find satisfaction. In order to see reality the way it really is you might have to reexamine what you were taught. And that is especially true when it comes to sex. Much of learning about the reality of sex is to unlearn all the misinformation you were taught.
Sex with Strangers
In spite of what we are taught, I often find it easier to have great sex with a total stranger than with someone I know. The reason is that with a stranger, you don't have all the other issues involved that distract one from the sex. You have had pure undistracted uninhibited sex without having to worry about complex emotional issues or how it's going to change the relationship. The sex is just sex, pure sex.
When I was 20 I used to do a lot of hitchhiking. I spent months on the road sleeping under overpasses and traveling for adventure. When someone picked me up I was a total stranger. Someone who they would never see again. And because I was a stranger and they were never going to see me again, they could talk to me about things in their lives that they would never tell anyone else in the world. People would tell me things they have never told anyone in their life.
"Now Marc!" you may ask, "Why are they telling you all their deep dark secrets?" Well, I'm glad you asked this all important question. One reason is that because I am a total stranger, it doesn't matter. I had no history with them and there were no other issues between us to distract from a totally honest conversation. They also know that after they drop me off, that they will never see me again. Thus, whatever they tell me isn't going anywhere. They don't know me, and I don't know them. It's an anonymous exchange.
Sometimes sex with a stranger is less inhibited because you have less emotional risk involved.
They other thing is that I know how to allow people to feel comfortable around me. I'm a very accepting person who is truly interested in other people. And I'm very accepting of a wide variety of people. I think other people sense this in me and they know that I'm safe, that no matter what they tell me, I'm not going to use it against them. Thus people are open with me. As you will see, making women feel comfortable and safe is a big part of being good in bed.
Strangers are like hitchhikers. You have no history with them and if you and they both have good social skills, and you're the kind of person that can allow a stranger to be sexually comfortable with you, you can get more sexually intimate quicker with a stranger than someone you love. Sex with strangers is a good way to get sexual practice and if you're single it's a good way to sharpen your skills. That way when your one true love comes into your life you'll be better at pleasing her sexually that if you're inexperienced and don't know what to do.
True love doesn't make you a good lover. You can be totally and completely in love and not be able to please her sexually. Sexual skills are independent and make sex better in the presence or absence of love. It's important to realize that love and knowledge are two separate things and you have to have the knowledge to do it right. If you love a woman then it will please her for you to understand her biology and her sexuality and her instinctive need to reproduce. After all, love exists for the survival of the species as well.
Moral, Legal and Political Issues
There's a lot of debate in the country about sex and morality. Is sex moral? Of course it is. Every one of us (except for a cloned sheep named Dolly) was created as a result of an act of sex. If sex is immoral then life itself is immoral. My opinion in general is that two (or more) consenting adults should be able to do anything they want free of government or religious intrusion. I for on don't need to ask Uncle Nanny for permission to get laid.
If you believe that my sexual activity isn't moral, then go ahead and believe it. I suppose after all that I will fry in Hell. That's my choice and it's up to me to make that choice. I think religion is a form of mental disorder, but you have the right to believe whatever you want regardless of how stupid I think it is. If you believe sex is evil then don't do it.
Prostitution is illegal in most places. So if someone asks if you've been with a sex worker, remember what Nancy Reagan says; Just say no. Prostitutes are some of the finest women I know and I'm lucky to have had the pleasure of their company.
I believe in honesty in a relationship. I was monogamous while I was married. I think that open marriages are fine. In my case we agreed to be monogamous and to me it was important from the aspect of being honest and keeping ones word to do what I promised. If you're going to have a relationship based on trust then it's best to do what you promised. I think that keeping one's word is a more important moral issue that church approved sex. I also believe it is my moral duty to keep the church and the state out of the bedroom.
There are a number of reason prostitution is illegal. You have your Christian types who oppose it for "moral" reasons. These people feel it's their right to stamp out all activity that they consider to be "sin". Little do they realize that a government that is empowered to regulate sex is empowered to regulate religion. Thus Christians are cutting their own political throats but aren't sharp enough to realize it.
Then you have a much more serious group, the sex-neg feminists who believe that prostitution is the ultimate form of female oppression by male dominated society. Again, these women can't get past the images they see on television and have no concept of what sex work is. A man who gives a woman money for a relationship, which often includes sex no more dominates her than a man who pays a mechanic to fix his car. When I take my car in to get it fixed I don't feel like I have power over the mechanic because I'm giving him money. He has power over me because I need my car fixed.
There are lots of prudes from Christians to Feminists who want the government to intrude into your private sex life in order to convince themselves they are morally superior. I ask you to support those who openly resist the idea of church or government controlled sex.
Lastly, wives fear whores because they are "competition". If your husband is unfaithful, you need to fix your relationship and deal with why he wants to be unfaithful. Whores don't cause the problem. I would point out that if your husband is being unfaithful that he is better off doing it with an escort than his secretary or someone who is actually competition. So I say to the wives who are reading this, male midlife crisis is real. It's usually temporary. It's something you can work through. And it's no reason to get divorced or break up your family. If you catch your husband with an escort, talk to him, work it out, and don't break up your family over it. There's no point in giving everything you own to a couple of greedy lawyers over a sexual indiscretion that is fixable.
Divorce laws in the United States are very hostile towards marriage and families. As long as we allow our courts to be used by crooked lawyers as tools to steal everything you have, the use of escort services will continue to rise.
The courts in the United States and other countries are very hostile towards the traditional family. There are too many people making too much money by destroying the lives of you and your children. Once a person has been through a nasty divorce they are far less likely to risk getting into a traditional relationship a second time. We allow lawyers to profit too much at the expense of the public and the government has become a predator allowing crooked lawyers to flourish at the expense of the family and the people who the courts are supposed to serve. If there is a moral issue surrounding escort services, it's that the penalty for being a good father and a good husband is much more severe than being caught with a hooker. When so called "proper behavior" is punished, people will stop behaving properly.
As you can tell, I have some issues with the government's role in sexual oppression. In writing this book on how to have good sex, I feel it's necessary to point out issues in society that are interfering with good sex and giving the reader the opportunity to realize that if you're experiencing government induced sexual problems, that helping to fight the government is part of the solution. I'm not just talking about the legalization of prostitution. I'm also talking about the legalization of marriage. If you are a good Christian husband who is working hard to make a good life for his family, you are more at risk from government persecution that I am. We all have a stake in keeping the State out of the bedroom. Sex is personal and is a fundamental right.
What Women Want
What's Under the Hood
To understand sex you have to understand women. Not that anyone can really do that, but there are things about women that you need to know in order to fully appreciate her. It's just like driving a car. If you understand the car you'll be a better driver than if you don't understand it. I'm not going to pretend I understand women, but I do understand some things about women that make the sex better. A lot of what I say here may sound obvious and it may be things you already know. If so then skip this chapter. But I include this to help create "the big picture" because this all fits together. So, please bear with me.
Much of what women want is the same thing men want. We all want to be happy, have friends, be loved, and feel like we have a place in the world. We want a good job, something we like to do, make some money, enough to be comfortable. We want a home to live in. We want to be safe. We want to eat good food. We want to be healthy. We want a good computer and a high speed connection to the internet. We want a car that doesn't break down, to be entertained, and to live long and prosper. And we all want to get laid and have good sex.
Women are just like us in these respects. It is important to realize that they are people to with the same needs and desires as you have. And with any woman, wife or sex worker, they are people and want to be treated with respect. In other words, if you are nice to them they are more likely to be nice to you.
In many ways women are sexually the same as men and in many ways they are different. Like us their brains are programmed from birth to fuck. Like us it really isn't optional. We have to fuck, they have to fuck. We really don't have that much choice although we like to think we do. It's all part of the reproductive instincts.
Women are a lot closer to the reproductive instincts than we men are. Our genetic function is to be the sperm donor. Biologically we are here to provide semen. Our bodies reproductive organs are pretty much limited to the penis and hormone systems that make us want to fuck women. Women on the other hand actually have the babies. Their bodies contain many more organs to support reproduction and their brains are wired differently to support their reproductive role. In many ways their needs are very different than that of men.
On a purely reproductive level, the goal of the male is to inseminate as many women as possible in order to spread his genetic material. Women need only one male, but need a good male. A male that will help her raise her children to reproductive age so that they can fuck and have children. Thus a woman is usually more interested in the relationship and holding the family together. Sometimes women will choose one man to be the genetic donor and another to be the father figure. But the details of how a woman's mind works with respect to choosing mates is way beyond my understanding. But it's useful to understand that these are issues that are on their mind.
Like men, women want good sex. They are sexually driven the way we men are. Sometimes a lot more than we can imagine. Like us, women masturbate. They get horny and they have to jack off (or Jill off). Although there is a lot of variation in women's sexual desires, in general, women are very sexual creatures and they want to get fucked.
When a woman has sex with you she wants to have orgasms. She is capable of masturbating and giving herself an orgasm. You don't have to make her come; she can do that by herself. All you have to do is let her come. Generally, if you don't mess things up, it's rather easy to get a woman to come. All you have to do is let it happen.
Great lovers are great because of what they do right as much as what they don't do wrong.
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One of the big myths in sex is that there's some magic technique that drives women wild. And that if you learn this technique you will be a great lover. That's not how it is. What generally happens is that men make a lot of mistakes that detract from the sex. These mistakes are so distracting that she can enjoy herself because men are doing a lot of things wrong. The biggest advance where men can improve themselves sexually is to stop doing the things that detract from the woman's sexual experience. There are lots of things that distract from the sex and make it not work for her. A lot of it has to do with timing, waiting till she's ready for it. Other things have to do with being comfortable, the bed feeling right, getting into the right position, and lubrication.
Getting in at the right angle is important. Maybe you're pinching her or cutting off the circulation to her leg. Other factors include having enough lubrication; how you smell; and the room temperature. All these things can be distractions. If she's not ready and these problems are taking away from the sex then she might have wanted to come, but she can't because things aren't right and she can't focus on the sex.
There may be psychological barriers. Maybe you just had a fight and she's thinking about that. Maybe you're moving to quickly and to rough. Maybe she doesn't feel entirely safe with you in that she doesn't feel comfortable being as sexually open with you as she would like to be. Women want screaming mad sexual ecstasy, but not with someone whom might not be able to handle it. And if she feels she has to hold back then she isn't going to have as good a time with you as she would like to have.
But it's important to understand that she wants it. She want's you to drive her wild. And if you don't mess it up it's going to happen. But most guys mess it up because they don't understand a lot of basic things that are easy to learn. Things they never taught to you. Things that seem obvious when you hear them. All you have to do is learn and learn how to learn on your own. All women are different so you have to learn what your sex partner wants. So part of learning how to fuck is learning how to learn what the woman you are with likes. Some women will just tell you what they want, but most won't, unless you invite them to.
Giving a woman what she wants sexually is a lot like taking her out to eat at a restaurant. The waitress comes and asks what you want. Suppose you order for her; you're just guessing what she likes. You might order what you like and hope she likes the same thing. But just because you like broccoli doesn't mean she'll like broccoli. If you order for her you might get lucky and you might not.
However, if you ask her what she wants and she tells you, then when you order for her she'll be getting what she wants to eat, and she'll be a lot more likely to enjoy the meal. In other words, you become much better at ordering dinner for her because you know what she likes. After many dates you know what places she like to go to and what she wants and you have no problem pleasing her. And she thinks you're a great date because she tells you what she wants and you give it to her.
Sex is just the same way. You can guess what she likes and read books about different techniques that work on different women. You can do different things you've learned and hope that it works, and maybe you'll get lucky. But the best way to find out is to ask. And in order to ask, you have to have a sexually trusting relationship where she feels comfortable telling you. This process of learning your ladies preferences is a very key part of becoming a great lover. Make a note of this because I will be coming back to it over and over again.
Male vs. Female Orgasms
One big difference between men and women is the orgasm. One interesting fact is that humans are the only primates where the female even has an orgasm. Males in all primate species always have orgasms, and there's a reason for this that a lot of women might not want to hear. The reason that men are more reliable in having orgasms is that the male orgasm is necessary for reproduction to occur. If the male doesn't ejaculate, the woman doesn't become pregnant. But not necessary for the female to come in order to reproduce. A woman can get pregnant if she comes or not, but if the male doesn't come then no children are going to result. We are all the descendents of men who can come, not men who can't. It is my theory, from the evolutionary point of view that orgasmically defective males throughout history failed to pass on their genes as compared to fully functional males. Therefore, we are the descendants of the males who could come, not the ones who can't.
Women on the other hand can reproduce without orgasm. The orgasm does help women retain sperm and it does stimulate the man to produce more sperm. So hotter women are favored by evolution over women who aren't as hot. But because the orgasm isn't necessary, more women have trouble coming than men do. I will note however that a woman who has an orgasm is more likely to get pregnant than a woman who doesn't have one. So there is an evolutionary basis favoring women's orgasms.
Women have the advantage that they can usually come more times than men can although this isn't always the case. Some women can come 30 times in a row at one minute intervals. Others have one good orgasm and that's it. Some just don't come at all. It isn't a reflection necessarily of how good a lover you are but that's just the way they are. And it also varies with their age, stress factors, if they've had children, if they're on medication or hormonal based birth control. And you find out about these things by talking to your partner and asking her about herself.
Women are more complex sexually than men. Men are rather simple; they have a dick, they want to fuck. You rub the dick and it comes, not really complex. When it comes down to it we are really only good for one thing. However, I'm good at opening jars too so I guess that doesn't apply to me.
Understanding the Basics
All Women are Sluts
The first thing to understand about women is that they want sex. They want good hot sex. The want to have orgasms. They want you to fuck their brains out. They want you to make them climb the walls. They want to feel your penis pumping hot cum into their waiting vaginas. All you have to do is be there to give them what they want.
In American culture you are taught, "Nice girls don't do that!" The hell they don't! You may look at some woman as a sweet little thing, Little House on the Prairie type woman. But inside that sweet little woman is a porn star who wants to be fucked silly. We are, after all, the descendants of three billion years of fucking. Women are hardly going to give up that kind of tradition. Just like you when you get so hot that you'll fuck anything that moves, women get that way too. They're just looking for a nice guy who can keep his mouth shut to do it with. And that someone might as well be you.
Women like to be treated nice. If you yell and get mad, it kills the mood. Be nice. Talk softly and smile a lot. Be gentle. Make her feel safe around you. By safe I mean that she can be herself without having to worry about you getting strange. Women need to feel safe and comfortable. If they tell you things that are secret, keep the secret. Don't tell your buddies about how she fucks unless she wants you to. Be polite. Touch her softly.
Women like to be complimented. They want to hear you say it. It's not enough that you know she's pretty, she wants you to tell her she's pretty. Even though the feminists' think that's not politically correct, don't listen to them. Even smart women like it when a man tells her she's pretty. It's the way women are. The female attracts the male.
Women like flowers. Flowers are pretty and they smell nice. Flowers are also a plant's sex organs and women like sexual symbols. A flower is a plant's way of saying, "fuck me".
I like telling women about "the Flowers and the Bees" when we're in bed about to have sex. This works, so take notes. I tell them about the flower being a plants sex organ. The flower is saying, "Com'mon bee, give it to me. You want that nectar don't you. Here I am baby. Pollinate me!" This is followed up with the appropriate hand gestures and buzzing sounds. They think it's funny, but you'll notice their flower starting to open.
Speaking of flowers, try orchids instead of roses. Buy her a phalenopsis orchid plant. It's not your average "prom orchid". They put out a spike once a year with about 10 flowers that are 1 1/2 inches across. The inner part looks like a vagina. Women love flowers that look like vaginas. It's an easy plant to grow and will cost you about $75 and is well worth it.
Some women like cards on special occasions. If she's into cards get one that is so sweet that you can't stand to read it. Then there are little pink stuffed animals. Some women love that with baby talk. Other women find it disgusting so you need to figure out your woman in advance. And again, this all comes under the "learn your woman" theory which will be mentioned over and over so listen up.
Take a bath. Clean the house. Use some air freshener. Put on some cologne. Dress nice. Have a good stock of supplies. This includes condoms, lubricant, sex toys if you're into that, something cold to drink in the fridge, Tampax in case she's on her period, a towel, etc. Candles are nice. Good music. Tasteful porn tapes are sometime good to set the mood. If you're going to do it, do it right. There's nothing more frustrating than getting ready to "do the nasty" and you don't have a condom and you have to say, "Hold that Thought" while you run to the grocery store and hope she doesn't change her mood before you get back.
By being prepared and having everything ready you don't have to deal with the distractions of being unprepared. It allows you to focus on the moment and eliminate things that distract from the moment. The ultimate goal is to get her so hot that her entire consciousness, her entire soul, exists in a few square inches of orgasming vaginal flesh. In order to make that happen, there can be no other distractions.
One thing men don't understand is lubrication. It has to slide real well. If she isn't wet and slippery, she's not going to enjoy it. All it will do is pinch and scrape and she'll be in pain and not enjoy herself at all. All she'll be thinking about is scraping raw flesh. If it doesn't slide right in, grease it up. And make sure the grease is handy. You'll also want to have a towel handy so you can wipe the excess grease off your hands. That way you won't get it in her hair. It's all part of being prepared.
If she's not wet it doesn't mean that she isn't horny. All it means is she's not wet. Some women have trouble getting wet at different times of the month. She might be taking medicine like antihistamines that cause every hole to dry up. Being dry isn't a reflection on you. It only means that you should grease it up first.
The three most important thing you need to make the sex comfortable is lubrication, lubrication, and lubrication.
Good lubrication is necessary. It is one of the common mistakes that a lot of guys get wrong. If it isn't greased up, nothing else matters. And the better it slides the better the sex will be. There are even times that you have to pull it out and add more grease. That's fine. If it feels like it's dragging, pull it out and smear some more on.
A woman won't come if she's in pain. You have to be careful you make sure what you're doing isn't hurting her. Besides lubrication you also want to avoid pulling her hair, cutting off the blood supply to her arms or legs, biting too hard, things like that. Women like to breathe so you want to watch you don't put your full weight on her and suffocate her. Be careful not to break anything. The important thing is to make her physically comfortable. That way she can focus on the sex.
It's like Petting Cats
When you go to pet a cat there are several thing you'll quickly learn. First of all you can't really pet a cat unless it wants to be petted. If you pet it anyway it will claw and hiss at you and run away. You have to approach it carefully. The cat notices you and slowly wonders over. It rubs around in a way that indicates it might want to be petted.
You then stick one finger out and let the cat smell it. Once the cat has sniffed you, you can then scratch its head a little. At that point the cat it ready to be petted, but you have to pet the cat that way it wants you to. You'll notice that the cat will give you signals. If it rubs its face against your hand it wants it on the face and head. If it arches its back it wants it down the back. If it rolls over and stretches it might want it on the belly. But you want to be careful because not every cat is a belly cat. You have to be a very advanced cat petter before you can go up to a strange cat and do it's belly. But if you understand advanced techniques for petting cats, (a book I hope to write some day), then you understand women.
The trick is to learn what she wants you to do, and then do it to her. It's that simple.
Women are like cats. She controls the sex. With men almost anything works. I suppose men are more like petting dogs. They're so happy to get attention that you can kick them and they're happy they're even getting noticed. But with a woman, she know that she can get petted any time she wants, and if you don't do it right you're going to feel some claws and teeth.
Like a cat, once your touching a woman she will give you clues as to how she wants to be touched and what she wants you to do next. What you have to do is watch for the clues and do what she wants. You go at her pace. First she might want to kiss, so you kiss. As she gets more excited the kissing will become more passionate. Follow her lead. You don't have to seduce her, just let her seduce herself. Watch her body signals.
If she pulls you in closer, pull her closer. If she touches her breast, start working on the breast. Touch it lightly and see how she responds. If she presses against your hand then work on them more. If she backs away then you back away and go back to what works. You can lead a little if you're careful. Touch lightly and see how she responds. If she likes it go for it, if not, back away and try something else. Or just lay back and let her do her thing.
How easy can it be? She tells you what she wants, you do what she tells you. Can it really be that easy? Yes it can!
Women will move in ways to indicate what to do next. If you're lying down and she starts rocking her hips she's telling you that she's ready for you to go "down there". That's the time to go for the crotch and start learning about how she likes it. Follow her movement as she repositions herself and shows you where she likes it. You probe her body and you watch carefully for her reaction. When you see something working, go for it. If it's not, then try something else. The key is to observe and respond.
Eventually she will give you the signal that it's time to "do the nasty". It's usually a pretty clear signal where she's ready and it's time to stick it in. I usually ask, "How do you like to do it?" But often she'll be either getting on top of me or pulling me on top of her. Then it's time to put the condom on and go for it.
Some women are shy and inhibited and some women are not shy and uninhibited. The uninhibited ones are easy. You know what they want because they let you know. The shy ones are trickier. You have to go slower and ask more questions. They want more conversation. The shy and inhibited ones want to be uninhibited, but it takes longer to build up that trust. But if you allow the extra time you can still get her to be as uninhibited as a porn star, and all you have to do is to create the environment that allows her to be sexually comfortable with you. She wants an intense sexual experience. All you have to do is allow it to happen. It's that easy!
The idea to remember here is that every woman wants her brains fuck out. When she's with you she's hoping, at least on a biological level, to have the hottest sexual experience of her life. You're hoping for the same thing. It's not something that you have to make happen as much as you have to let it happen. The way to do it right is to listen and watch for the clues. Her instincts will take over. What you do is allow the instincts to happen. Make her feel safe and comfortable so as to allow the instincts to come out. You don't have to know what to do. All you have to do is let her show you.
Getting back to cats, all cats are belly cats. They just love to stretch and have their belles rubbed. However, few cats actually let you do this and have never had a human go in and do its belly. In fact if even try to touch its belly you're going to feel claws and teeth. But once you've mastered the ability to mind meld with the cat and merge yourself totally in the cats energy, to where you and the cat are one, you can do anything, touch it anywhere, and the cat loves it as it lays there in helpless bliss.
Inside every woman is a porn star waiting for the right man to bring it out. Someone who can allow her to be a whore, to be totally into her primal instinctual nature. To be the total female animal in heat and offering herself to the male animal to be fucked. That's what they want. That's what you want. And it's not hard to make it happen. In fact it's the kind of thing that would normally happen on it's own if you don't mess it up. So the trick in getting there is to realize that you don't make it happen, you allow it to happen.
It isn't what you are doing that matters. It's that you are both doing it together. That you are synchronized and you are together as one.
I grow African Violets. Most people think African Violets are hard to grow, but they aren't. The trick to growing them is to water them and let them alone. If you mess with it, the plant will die. The plant blooms in cycles. When you buy it, it's blooming. After three weeks it stops blooming and you think something is wrong. It was blooming, now it's not. This is when most people water it more, add fertilizer, and put it in a new pot. A week later the plant is dead. However, if you leave the plant do it's own thing in about 4 months it's blooming again. You can't make it happen, you have to let it happen.
Women are like African Violets. They want to bloom. But men think they have to make it happen. They try to do things to make the woman come, but the timings not right. She's not ready mentally and it's not happening. Both are aware that it's not happening that the issue of failure becomes a distraction. Neither of you are focused on the sex and therefore you aren't really enjoying it. It doesn't matter what they do because you aren't doing it together. You have to be synchronized.
Many people think there some magic technique and if you hit the "G Spot" you will attain true love. Or maybe it's the "velvet buzzsaw" or the "butterfly flick" or some other method you think will get you there. Method is somewhat important, and I will go into that, but method isn't the thing that really makes it work. What really works is that whatever you do that you do it together. To people doing it together, that's what makes it work.
It's like singing a song with someone else. First you have to pick the song and decide what you're going to sing. Some songs are better than others are, but whatever you sing, it what you both decided to sing together. It's a good idea to pick a song you both know the words to. Then you start singing together. First you warm up, clear your throats, sing a few notes, and try to synchronize. You have to harmonize you voices together and get the timing right.
As you practice your timing becomes exact. You sing in unison. You voices harmonize and the song itself develops a life of it's own. Before this happens, you are two people trying to sing together. Then all of a sudden the song comes to life and it attains it's own reality. The song is there and you both are just part of the song. Together you become one with the music and one with each other and you become the music. Instead of two people singing a song, you become one song.
This is the secret of how sex works. It doesn't matter what you are doing as long as you are synchronized. First you are two naked people who are clumsily groping each other, her trying to get you hard, you trying to get her wet. You're exploring how you want to do it, like choosing what song to sing together. Next thing you do is stick it in and things aren't really working. You're going at it and she's not, or she's going at it and you're not. You have to synchronize. You feel her lust, she feels your lust, and you become a single lust ready to fuck.
At first you have to line things up and get comfortable physically. Get into the right position to start humping. Then you both move slowly, just like two singers warming up together. You establish a pattern and a rhythm. It doesn't matter if the rhythm is slow or fast, gentile or rough, hard or soft. What matters is that you establish a rhythm. Once you establish a rhythm the sexual feeling builds and as it builds the sex becomes real and exists between you. At first you were two people trying to fuck. Now the sex is there are you are just part of the sex. And the sex exists between you and you join as one sharing the sex. And the sex becomes like the song. And as the singers turn into the song, the lovers turn into the sex.
The important point to learn here is to merge together, synchronize and harmonize. That it's not the technique, but that you are doing the same thing and you are doing it together. When you are fucking you are the continuation of a tradition that has lasted three billion years. Your brains are wired to share this experience. All you have to do is allow the instinct to come out.
Putting it in
The first thing to do after putting it in is to start to get in sync. You put it in slowly and gently. If she's dry then pull it out and grease it up. The first thing you have to achieve is to get in and make sure she's comfortable. This involves holding you body up over her in a way that allows her to move around and get the positioning right. This is a very important step and if you blow it here you've ruined the sex. I've heard a lot of reports from women who say that most men can't get them off because they never get it in right in the first place. This is one of those examples of things men do wrong that mess up what would otherwise be great sex.
This is a very sensitive area for a woman and care must be taken to get everything lined up right. If she's in pain it distracts from the sex and you'll never synchronize. Fortunately getting it in right is easy to do once you learn how. The basic trick is to let her do it.
The easiest way to get it in right is to let her put it in for you. Give her room you get it in the way it feels best for her.
As you're putting it in make sure you give her room to move around. This lets her adjust herself under you and get it right. Let her reach down and guide it in. She'll work it on in and scoot around for the correct angle and pressure. What you have to do is follow her bodily instructions and let her adjust you the way she needs to get comfortable. When she's got it the way she want you'll know it because she will start fucking you when everything's right. Once it's in it's time to start getting synchronized.
The important point here is to allow her to get comfortable with you inside her. This has a lot to do with size and shape and every two people fit together differently. Most everyone can pretty well fit one way or another, but you have to take the time to get the fit right. This is something she has to do whether she's on top or bottom. If she's on top it's easier for her to get it in right. On bottom it's a little trickier, but all you have to do is raise up enough to let her get it adjusted right. Just let her stick it in and go for it.
Finding the Clit
A woman's clit is one of the main centers of a woman's sexual feeling. That's where most of the nerves are concentrated that allows her to feel the fucking. It is somewhat similar in that way to your dick and it needs to be stimulated. If you don't get your dick rubbed, you're not going to come no matter how much you're in love. It is similar with a woman's clit. If you're going to get her to come, you better find the clit.
There are differences between men and women. Women can be sexually stimulated in more places than men can. So it is possible to get some women to come in other ways. That's all part of the process of understanding your sex partner and getting her to show you want she likes. However, sometimes women are shy and they don't tell you what they want. So, when in doubt, work the clit.
The clit is real easy to find. Go down from the navel (belly button) until you get to the slit. There's a little piece of flesh in there that feels like a miniature dick. That's the clit. If you can't find it ask her to show it to you.Rate My Nude Photo
The clit must be treated carefully. If you touch it directly touch it softly. But you can rub it indirectly by rubbing the flesh around it. Whenever you are stimulating a woman with your hand watch very closely to see if she's enjoying it or you are hurting her. It's easy to do the wrong thing. Probe around and see what works.
It's important to understand how women are built and what makes them work. The more you understand the female body the more you will be able to give her sexual pleasure.
The easiest way to learn is to ask her to masturbate while you watch. Or you hand have her masturbate with your hand while she controls the motion and instructs you on how to move your fingers. This is best because you really get to understand the details of how she works. Once you lean this you'll understand how to get her hot. All you have to do is work the clit till she demands to be fucked.
Although most of you know this, if you're going to use your fingers on a woman you need to keep you fingernails trimmed and wash your hands. Women don't like guys to put dirty greasy fingers up inside them.
Fucking the Clit
Contact with the clit is important when you're fucking. This is another area where the average guy fails to achieve victory so pay attention here. If you don't stimulate the clit it is not likely she's going to come. If you want her to come, you have to fuck the clit.
The way most guys fuck is that they are doing push-ups. The dick is sliding back and forth from 3/4th out to 3/4th in. This is the way 3/4th of men fuck and if this is the way you fuck you're doing it wrong. Listen up guys because here is one of those places where you can really make a difference. Once you learn how to fuck the clit you will turn into an awesome lover.
The correct way to fuck is to put it in all the way and push in putting pressure against the whole vagina and locking her clit between her pelvic bone and yours. Then rocking your hips back and forth you grind the clit between the two of you while you grind your dick around in her. The sliding in and out will be mostly from 3/4ths in to all the way in with most of the motion being all the way in and grinding it. This is what actually works and if you try this you'll notice a big difference instantly. This works! This is what women want. And when you grind the clit like that, they're going to come.
The easy way to find the clit is to let her do it for you. If you give her room to move around she'll position herself so that her clit is being stimulated. She'll move herself against you so as to create contact. All you have to do is allow yourself to be positioned. In many way's it's a lot like having you're mother dress you when you were a kid. All you have to do is cooperate.
One thing to remember. When you're fucking generally you should be humping in a way that puts pressure upwards and forward, pressing your penis towards the top, rather than the bottom, of her vagina. This often results in her slowly scooting towards the headboard of the bed. So every now and then you have to raise up so she can push herself back down the bed. But that's something you have to live with.
A lot of sex is very mechanical. It's learning how you get things to fit together and grind it in a way that feels good.
One way around that problem of scooting forward is you lay on top of her with your arms around her shoulders. That allows you to hold her in place while fucking her in a forward direction. It's also very personal and intimate and allows for kissing and ear sucking. In this position you always want to make sure she has room to breathe and that you aren't crushing anything. Suffocation distracts from the experience.
Another trick is to raise up above her and put your arms straight out and rigid on the bed so that she can hook her elbows around your arms and push back. Or you can put your arms on either side of her head so that her shoulders are pushing against your wrists holding her in place. Either of these two methods allows her you push back and really grind that clit.
When you're doing it right you'll see her respond. She'll move and pull you in closer. Watch for the hints. She will show you exactly what to do if you only watch for the clues. All you have to do is pay attention and listen. When she say's "harder" you fuck her harder. If she says "faster" you fuck her faster. If she slows down, you slow down. And when she gets done she'll say, "God damn baby! Where did you learn to fuck like that?" And you just say, "I learned it all from you honey. You taught me how to do it right!"
Let her get on top
One way to learn is to let the woman get on top of you. In this position she controls the motion and you can see how she likes to fuck. What you notice is that she won't be doing push-ups on top of you. She'll work it on down in and slide up and down at first. Sometimes she'll rub her clit with her fingers while she's getting herself hot. But once she starts humping you seriously you'll notice she'll go all the way down on it and lean forward grinding her clit against your pelvic bone. It will show you how she likes her clit stimulated. Once you've learned this you can do the same thing to her clit when you're on top, as she did to her own clit when she was on top.
Ladies Come First
Most women can have many more orgasms than men can. There are some exceptions. Therefore, it seems that a gentleman will let the lady come first. Personally I enjoy watching women come and the way they feel when they come. I like to get women to come at least 5 times before I come. I've been able to get some women off 30 to 50 times, but most women can't do that. Some times I can, some times I can't. But I always like to try.
A lot of people strive for the simultaneous orgasm. Those are cool when they happen. But I like to get the woman to come first and try to get simultaneous on the fifth one. With many women, once the come the first time it's easy to get them off again.
It's much easier to have a simultaneous orgasm if she has had several orgasms first.
Once she's come several times the easiest way to get simultaneous is to let her know when you are building up and when you are about to come. Some good hot grunting, groaning, yelling, and announcing the moment is approaching is a good way to make it happen. She can feel you build up and that makes her hot and often causes her to synchronize with your orgasm.
If a woman has already had several orgasms she will likely come again when you do. She's already in the orgasmic mode and women are biologically wired to respond to a man's sexual excitement. They can feel the tension building up and when they feel your penis pumping inside them their instincts will usually take over and they will come. It's very easy to have the simultaneous orgasm if you get her off several times first.
All women have lovely breasts. No breast is too small or too big or not shaped right. And if you're ever asked by a woman if there's anything wrong with her breasts, "Just say No!" To criticize a woman's breasts it to invite death. She's a beautiful woman and that's why you're fucking her. Never forget that. All women are beautiful.
Most women want you to fool with their breasts. Some don't. This varies quite a bit from woman to woman. Women are usually quite intimate with their tits. Tits are a big issue to woman. It's something men can relate to but just have to understand that's the way it is. To love her is to love her tits. Don't try to understand it, just learn it.
Some women's breasts are very sensitive. Others could care less. Many women, some 15% or so actually have orgasms while breast feeding. So sucking a woman's breast is usually a good thing to try, especially with women who have had children. Breast sucking brings you closer to the biological/reproductive level. And as I've pointed out, anything that makes a woman feel like she's reproducing is generally very hot sexually.
With that in mind you might be wondering what is the best way to suck breast? What seems to work the best is to suck the same way a baby sucks it. Suck it like you're trying to drink milk. In you mind the milk is in there and you going to get it out. Sometimes, if you suck it right and do it often enough some women will actually start producing milk. I haven't actually accomplished this myself, but I've heard it can happen.
Of course, like anything else, the best way to figure out if you're doing it right is to ask. If she tells you what she wants and you do it you'll be ahead of just guessing. The big secret in how to do it right is to observe and learn. What you think you know may not be the way things really are.
First you need a Woman
Practice makes perfect and you can read about it and you won't really know it. You have to try it out. And to do that you need a sex partner. If you're married or have a girlfriend who is willing you're ready to start practicing. All you have to do is tell her you want to become a better lover and ask her to help you learn. Find a bed and get to work.
If however you don't have a lover you might be even better off. You can rent one. The phone book is full of Escort Services. Escorts are sex workers that come to your house and you pay them by the hour. They are professional sex workers and have a lot of sexual experience. For details about how to call for an Escort, read my Men's Guide to Escort Services at http://sex.perkel.com/escort/index.htm . It has a step by step guide to getting a woman to practice with for sexual training.
Hiring a sex worker may well be the best teacher available to you. She allows you to concentrate on the sex and she is someone with a lot of experience and few inhibitions.
Even if you have a lover you might still want to practice with a sex worker. With a sex worker you can focus on the sex without the distractions of the relationship. Because the sex worker is a stranger, you might feel more comfortable discussing your needs and issues that you can't tell someone who knows you. Sex Workers are very nice women and generally are turned on by the idea of teaching sex to men. And who would know it better than someone who does it for a living would?
The first thing you'll notice with either a sex worker or your lover that the idea of teaching and learning about sex is in itself a very sexy situation. The hottest sex is deliberate sex. You are telling her that you want to give her orgasms. She is telling you that she wants you to make her come. Deliberate sex, with the intent to have orgasms, is a very good mental state to start from. As you will learn, sex is a very mental thing. And to agree up front to have orgasms almost in itself guarantees that it will happen.
Woman on Top
As I stated earlier, it's not so much what you do right, but what you don't do wrong. Therefore, if you do almost nothing, believe it or not, you will probably be a better lover. Plus you will be in a position to watch and learn. When you try this you will be amazed at how well it works.
The first thing to try is with the woman on top. You lay on your back with a pillow under your butt to raise your pelvis up higher. This is what I call "Wild West". She's the cowgirl; you're the saddle. She gets on top of you. What you agree to do is that she fucks you until she comes. All you do is lay there, stay hard, don't come yourself, and just smile and watch. You can play with her tits or grab her hips or ass. Try to figure out what she likes best. What you are doing, by agreement, is that she's going to jack off on top of you, and you're going to watch her do it.
What's very important here is that she is in control. You are there to watch and learn. You can move your pelvis a little for synchronization, but she's fucking you, not the other way around. What you need to do is keep the angle right. Let her move in ways that she wants. Watch her and learn. She's showing you what she likes. You're learning how women's bodies work. She's opening up to you sexually and she'll allow herself to do things that she might have otherwise been too embarrassed to do.
The important points that make this work is understanding that she wants to fuck and she wants to come. She can easily do this by masturbating because when a woman masturbates, she stimulates herself exactly the way she needs to. When she is on top of you, she has more control of the action and can move the way she needs to in order to get off. Basically what's really happening here is that she's jacking herself off on your cock. She's masturbating with a penis inside her. Since she wants to come and can masturbate there's almost no way that she's going to fail to come as long as you let her do her own thing and just lay there and watch it happen.
Getting a woman to come with this technique is so easy that a dead man could do it.
The other thing that makes it hot is that she knows she's showing you what she likes. She's putting on a porn show for you. She's jacking herself off in front of you and she knows you're watching her do it. Women have an instinct to need a man to watch her be fucked. Her sexual excitement stimulates men to come and creates an evolutionary reason to show off her sexual excitement. The fact that you are watching her is a real turn on.
While she's riding you, stay hard. Don't come too soon. Let her have fun and watch. You can touch her breasts if she wants you to. Or you can hold her arms or lock your fingers with hers. Or you can rub her thighs. Hold your pelvis thrust forward so she can get it in deep. One thing you can do is twitch it every now and then like you're coming in her. The twitching will drive her wild.
As you watch her you will see how she moves and how she touches herself. She might start playing with her clit or twisting her nipples. Watch and learn. She's showing you what she likes. All you have to do is remember it and do it to her. Once you know her moves the sex is easy.
When you get done she'll think you're an incredible lover. She'll want to know, "Where did you learn how to do THAT!" And you'll be there wondering, "Do that?" All I did was lay there and watch. And suddenly you'll realize that sex is very different that what you thought it was and it's real easy to get women to come. That all you have to do is let them do what they already want to do. "Marc, can it really be that easy?" you might ask. You bet it can! And when you impress your lady, or impress your sex worker, it will change your life and see sex in a very different way. Just doing this will put you in the top 10% of all lovers.
You can become a woman's hottest sexual experience ever by just laying there and doing nothing but watch.
Rate My Nude Photo
I swear it is true that you can do this, where you basically do little or nothing and you will find women who will swear that it was the hottest sexual experience of their entire life. They will think you are an incredible lover when you did virtually nothing but lay they and watch. Once you learn how easy it is to be a great lover it will change your attitude and build your confidence. And as you will learn, confidence is a big turn on as well.
This is always educational once you get up the nerve to do it. It's a big step forward in a relationship for people who aren't used to doing this. You have to get over the embarrassment of jacking off in front of someone else. And you have to make her comfortable enough so she can jack off in front of you.
Mutual masturbation accomplishes two things. The first and most obvious is that it allows each person to show the other what they each like. That way you understand the other person's physical needs. Everyone is different and it allows you to learn about that specific person.
A woman has to trust you with her sexuality in order to fully open herself up to you and allow herself to achieve total sexual pleasure.
The other thing that it does is to open up sexual trust. One of the limiting factors, particularly for women, is that their sexual potential is limited only by the mental factors that keep them from fully expressing themselves sexually. The more mental factors are removed the hotter they are. This allows the inner porn star to come out and lets them express who they really are sexually. Mutual masturbation is a big step forward in removing these mental barriers for both partners.
The woman on top position can be the same as her masturbating in front of you bit because it's fucking, she's less embarrassed to do it. But since she's doing all the work it's the same thing, except you get to feel her insides while she doing it.
Using the Mind
Confidence makes Women Come
A woman's hottest sex organ is her mind. It's not all in the mind of course. You have to get the body stuff right. But once you have the physical stuff understood it's time to move on to the brain. Because the brain is where the sexual thoughts and fantasies begin. Her body wants to be fucked, but her brain has to be involved in the experience. During sex you are sharing who you are and she's sharing who she is.
Whole books have been written on what thoughts get women hot and I'm not in a position to cover everything here. There are millions of things that get women hot. But one thing in particular I want to mention is that women are really turned on by a man's sexual confidence.
As you get to be a better lover you'll notice more women telling you that you're the best fuck they even had in their life. You'll start to feel good about yourself and you'll become confident. You get to the point that you KNOW you can make almost any woman come and women can sense that you know that. You know they are going to come, they know they are going to come, so they come. Women can feel your sexual confidence and it makes them really hot.
Confidence comes with success and success comes with confidence. As you use the techniques in this book you should see results. As you see results you should become more confident. As you become more confident you should see more results.
Women can sense a man's sexual confidence and she responds to it.
Women are turned on by who you are personally that what you look like. That means that if you're an ordinary middle aged geek like me and you still have a chance. Women like men who have an inner strength. Men who understand women and are comfortable around women. As you learn more about women you will develop that personality trait that women respond to. And when you're fucking them and they can feel you confidence, and resistance is futile!
Women are naturally submissive and men are naturally dominant. Not to say this is always the case. Switching roles is fun too. But generally a woman offers her vagina to the man so he can fuck her. As he jacks himself off inside her he stimulates her to respond and get him hotter. He can sense that part of her is under his control and that he is jacking her off. Her body is responding to his lusts and prepares to absorb his semen. His ejaculation often triggers her orgasm and causes her cervix to dip repeatedly down into the sperm pool and suck it up into her uterus.
When a woman senses a man is confident she knows he can get the job done. So when she decides to allow him to fuck her she anticipates he will be able to cause her to come. This excites her and helps make her orgasms occur. Confidence is sort of like what they say about money. You have to have money to make money. You have to be confident to have confidence. But where do you start? You start with this book and practice. This stuff works and will build up you confidence which will make you even better.
In order for a woman to come she has to trust you sexually. Women in general are very timid sexually. They were raised to believe that women who come are sluts, bad girls if you will. And men are raised to be judgemental of women who are too openly sexual. If a woman doesn't trust you sexually, she won't be able to open up to you the way she might like to.
We humans are strange creatures. As we evolved and as our minds developed we started to become aware of the act of doing sex. Humans are the only creatures on the planet which has the ability to decide not to reproduce. And this ability to decide to not reproduce only applies to a small percentage of the population. In reality, for the vast majority of people, sex really isn't optional. You have to do it, and you really don't have the choice not to. And that applies to both men and women. You have to have it; she has to have it. I don't see why people don't just accept that and realize that sex is something people need to do together and just do it.
But sex has become in the eyes of society as something that's immoral. Logically, if sex is immoral then life itself is immoral. However, I'm a nerd so what makes sense to me probably isn't going to change anyone's mind. I think the problem is that humans are to self important. We like to think of ourselves as being above the average beast. However, when we fuck we become one with the beasts. Just listen to the noises we make. I'm grunting, she's screaming, or faces look like we're in pain, we're naked, it's very undignified. Not the kind of think we want society to picture us doing. We are humans after all, not creatures!
Well, not me. I'm just another male beast. I'm only the third generation in my family to walk upright. I am your typical male. I'm just one of three billion men on this planet who wants to get laid. I'm not what some might call, "highly evolved". We humans are just a chemical pattern that exists on a speck of dust in the universe and exists for but an instant in time. We just aren't that important. Men are just another species of male beast looking for women to fuck.
Therefore, it's OK to fuck and enjoy it. And it's important to realize that it's OK and to make your partner feel like it's OK. Women have to understand that it's OK for a man to just want to fuck. And men have to understand that women want it too and they need to be able to trust you, and if they open up to you sexually that you won't turn weird on them and make them regret it.
What makes the great lovers great isn't that they do great things, but that they don't do things wrong that detract from the sex. Women want to be porn stars and all you have to do is let them do it. But that's easier said than done. But if you can adjust yourself mentally to allow a woman to enjoy herself the way she already wants to, she'll think youíre the world's greatest lover. And all you really did was to create the environment that permits her to express herself sexually. You're not really doing anything but letting her be free and that makes you the best lover she ever had in her life. Can it really be that easy? Yes, it can, and it is.
Do women like porn? Yes they do. Like men, women are stimulated by sexual images. When people see other people having sex, it puts ideas into our heads and gets us thinking about it. The same is true for women. Women are stimulated by sexual images.
There are differences between men and women as to what is a turn on. Watching women excites men. Interesting enough many women like to watch women more than they want to watch men. One of the hottest videos I've seen I actually recorded from "The Learning Channel" (TLC) on a series they were showing about sex. The inserted a medical camera inside a woman and showed the woman's cervix as she had an orgasm. The cervix looked like a hole that repeatedly dipped into the sperm pool. You could see six waves of contractions. I showed this clip to several women and it had a profound affect on them. Made them very very horny.
So, how do you pock some good porn to help get your lady in the mood? The easy answer is to let her pick the porn. She's obviously going to pick something she likes, and if she likes it she's going to want to fuck. Pretty simple stuff.
If you are in a position where you have to do the shopping you can go to the adult video store and ask the people there which movies are popular with women. If there is a female employee it's better to ask her. If you actually have to make the choice yourself try going for something that doesn't contain violence or things that offend women. Women like to watch other women come so you want scenes containing intense female orgasms with lots of realism. Many porn stars are porn stars because they like the work. A lot of those orgasms are real. That's what women want to see. They want to see women getting their brains fuck out.
Women also like good come shots where you can really see it squirt. A trick I like doing is after a good come shot, rewind the tape and run it in slow motion, the slower the better. In slow motion she can really see it squirt and see all the detail. Women like this because squirting penises lead to pregnancy. The evolutionary rule says anything that leads to pregnancy is going to be hot.
How Fast to Go - How much Foreplay
You may be wondering if you should take a long time to move through these steps or go quickly. All this foreplay talked about here might take a long time or it might move rather quickly. Many women complain that men don't spend enough time getting them ready. The issue isn't how much time you spend but whether or not they are ready for it. If she is ready in 30 seconds then go for it in 30 seconds. It's not how much time you spend, but whether or not you've gone through all the steps.
It's not how much time you spend in foreplay. It's whether or not you get them ready that counts.
A woman has to be in the right mental state and be ready to be fucked. This can take anywhere from 30 seconds to 30 years. The issue isn't how much time to spend in foreplay, but whether or not you have her ready or not. The right amount of time is the amount of time it takes to get her to where she wants to be fucked. When you get her ready to be fucked, you've done enough foreplay.
So, how do you know when she's ready to be fucked? One simple way is if she says, "OK, fuck me already!" That's a pretty good hint that she's ready for it. And if you have established sexual trust and she's comfortable with you, she's likely to say something like that. And if she does, it's very easy to get her off quickly once you start.
Some women aren't so explicit about it. You have to watch for body movements as clues to her state of sexual excitement. Again, it's like petting a cat. She'll give you clues as to what to do next. All you have to do is follow them. When she starts rocking her hips she wants physical contact on her cunt. Either respond with your hand or tongue or slip your leg between hers so she can start rubbing her pussy on your leg. Direct stimulation of the cunt is one of the last and usually necessary stages of foreplay.
Just keep fooling around and let her continue to get hot until she tells you to stick it in. That's the whole trick behind foreplay.
Once you're directly stimulating her cunt or she's stimulating her own cunt by playing with it or rubbing it on you, the time to start fucking is coming close. She'll start playing with your cock, rubbing it hard, (often too hard) indicating she's ready for it. This might include her trying to pull you on top or repositioning herself so that you can stick it in. I like to tease them with it just a little past when they're ready so that they are good and ready. But not so long that they are yelling, "OK, fuck me already God damn it!"
Foreplay is a mental process. You get her mind ready which, in turn gets her body ready. Foreplay is the process between when you've pretty much decided to fuck and actually fucking. If you fuck her before she's ready she probably won't enjoy it and will be less willing to have you back for more. You can look at foreplay as being like cooking dinner. If you start to eat it before it's cooked you won't like it. But if you're willing to wait till it's cooked, then you'll have a fine meal. How do you know when "dinners ready"? Simple, when she serves it to you. It's that easy.
Sex is a very visual act and women like looking at it as well as doing it. Women like to look down and watch it slide in and out. This is very exciting for them if you are comfortable letting her watch and showing it off.
Sometimes when I see a woman watching it I'll pull it all the way out and rub her clit with it and tell her I'm giving her a good look at it. I encourage her to feel how hard it is and see what it looks like in action. Then I slip it back in and let her feel it in action. This works very well and is quite exciting because it is deliberate. Being deliberate about sex is a mental technique that works very well. And exhibitionism is a way of showing her that you mean business.
It's not your good looks but the fact that you are deliberately showing it to her that's exciting.
You don't have to be good looking to be an exhibitionist. As you can see from my picture on my web site, I'm nothing special to look at. We are always more critical of our own looks than other people are. If she's looking down at it, she want to see it. Why she wants to see it might be a mystery, but if she's looking, show it to her. Actually, in many cases she's watching herself being fucked. But you are an important part of the scene.
Not all women are into it. Again I say, look for the clues. If she is into total darkness so no one see anything then donít be an exhibitionist. You can show you your lust for her in how you fuck her. Exhibitionism doesn't have to be only visual exhibitionism. You also show yourself off by how you move, the tension in your muscles, you breathing, and the sounds you make. And this form of exhibitionism is more common and more acceptable in our conservative society.
Exhibitionism is not just visual. It's also the way you move and the sounds you make that display your excitement.
In fact, ham it up. If your shy about this work on becoming less shy. Men often experience intense sexual feeling yet are embarrassed by it and try to hide it. That's not the right think to do. Not only should you not hide it, you should show it off. You can learn to exaggerate your experience so she can see, hear, and feel your sexual excitement. The more she can experience your sexual excitement, the more it will trigger a response from her. Your orgasm will trigger her orgasm if you show it off right. If you hide it you won't get the same response.
The reason this works is that, as I have said, sex is about getting women pregnant. Anything that leads to that is going to feel good. This is an animal instinct that she has little or no control over. You are tapping into behavior that is hard coded into the female brain and this goes back billions of years before humans ever existed. This work because it has always worked and when it stops working, humans will become extinct, except for new cloning technologies. But that's outside the scope of this discussion.
A woman's entire sexuality is centered on the goal of extracting semen from you so she can get pregnant. Thus the act of a man ejaculating inside her is not only going to feel good, it's going to feel the best. It's not just a part of the process, it's the goal. Women live for the feeling of a cock pumping cum deep inside them. Therefore that is going to feel the best. But second best is the sexual tension leading up to the pumping of semen. As your excitement builds and she can sense it's coming, her excitement builds too. She knows your making the final run towards the goal line and the crowd is going wild. It gives her body more time to prepare for the big event when you unload your wad into her. That's what she's waiting for. That's what it's all about.
However, she has to know it's coming. If you're fucking her quietly and hide it and then you say, "Guess what. I just came. I'm done." that's not what women are looking for. They want to see you get excited, feel your cock thrusting harder. They want to feel you tighten up and get the serious look on your face that tell her you're going to get her pregnant. She wants to hear your heavy breathing, moaning and groaning, even some growling as the sexual tension builds up. You can throw in some deliberate statements like, "I'm jacking off inside you. Feel me jack off." This lets her experience you with all her senses and know that you are going to come in her and come hard.
Coming hard and exaggerating your experience will be more exciting for both of you and is one of the key secrets to being an incredible lover.
You are experiencing the primordial sensations of every other male beast on the planet in the process of getting the female pregnant. She is experiencing what every female beast feels as she is being inseminated. At that moment you are one with all life. Better be using good birth control or you'll create someone else who will grow up and repeat the process.
When a woman feel this kind of sexual tension inside her she can't help but to have an orgasm in response. This is especially true if she has already had several orgasms before this point. The sensation of your cock pumping sperm into her causes her to come and the waves of sensation causes the mouth of her uterus, the cervix, to dip repeatedly into the sperm pool and drink the cum up into her. It also causes her cunt to contract around the head of your cock forming a seal and at the same time opening the cervix so as to force the cum up into her uterus, increasing the chance of pregnancy. When this happens, you've done it right. One of the ways you can tell is that it takes about 4 hours for some of the glob to make it back past the cervix and run out. So some flow back in the form of a glob about four hours later is something that generally happens only during great sex. Something to look forward to.
The secret of good sex is to allow yourself to become and experience the male beast you really are.
We have all seen various wildlife documentaries on television showing the mating habits of various forms of beasts. We've seen dogs fuck in the park. We've heard cats doing it keeping us up at night. When it come to sex, we humans are not above the animals. Animals are totally uninhibited. They just do it. When humans just do it without inhibitions, we are as good as the animals. Various women have asked me in the past, "Marc, what makes you so damn good?" My answer is that I fuck as good as the average male dog. The point here is that you to can fuck as good as the average male dog and become the hottest man your woman has ever experienced. So go out and howl at the moon because that's what women are looking for in a man.
Women are instinctively exhibitionists. They need to show off their sexuality to you.
Women are also aroused by being exhibitionists themselves. In nature the female is usually the one who uses her sexual displays to let the males know she's ready to be fucked. I believe that when you have sexual trust happening and allow your partner to become uninhibited, she will want to show off her body and her sexual desire to you. This not only stimulates you, but it stimulated her as well. She want to show you her body and her excitement because it helps her get the sperm out of you she instinctively wants. You lust in necessary to her genetic survival and therefore she needs to get you hot. Showing you her stuff is part of how she does that.
Although it is politically incorrect to treat women as sex objects, that rule doesn't apply when you're about to have sex. Woman want your lust, need your lust, and need to make you feel lust. It's all part of the process and it's the way it really is. This is the way we humans reproduce and the closer we understand reality the way it really is, the more fun we're going to have fucking. Good sex is perhaps the reward for knowing the truth of sex rather than the mythology surrounding it.
True Sex Stories
If these stories sound like I'm bragging it's because perhaps I am. However, the goal in telling this is to show that if a middle aged nerd can do this, you can to. The point here is to help make you feel confident about the information here so you can try this for yourself and experience the things I've experienced. Some of the stories here are things that happened to other people who were using the same techniques mentioned in this discussion. I will leave you to guess which stories are mine and which are other people's stories. That way this is all educational and not about anyone in particular. I will use the word "I" in all the stories so that they will all be alike. Understand though that I did not do all these things myself. But all these stories are true and really happened the way I am telling it. The point here is that it doesn't matter who did these things, but that these stories could be about you if you learn what I'm talking about here. This really does wo rk.
Honey and the Prune
A hooker I know was telling me a story about one of her regular clients. The client was an old man that she guessed at 80 years old. He was a skinny wrinkly old man. He had so many wrinkles they nicknamed him the "Old Prune". The Old Prune was in good shape and came in about once a week.
But the Old Prune had been around and had learned his stuff about how to do it right as Honey described it. She said that the Old Prune got her to come every time, sometimes several times. In fact she said that it was very strange because she'd have a big orgasm and look up and see the Old Prune fucking her, who she did not find physically attractive at all, and wonder how it was he was getting her off so good. "The Old Prune, she would say, "He sure can fuck!"
What's significant here is that it doesn't matter what you look like in that if you do it right you can get a woman to come who thinks you're repulsive because you're doing it right where an attractive man who did it wrong wouldn't have a chance. It also shows that a woman's cunt has physical properties that if stimulated right will produce orgasms for which the woman has no control over. Although Honey thought the Old Prune was a nice old man, she had no attraction for him at all, and had no desire to come with him. However, do to the Old Prune's skills, Honey had no choice. Honey told me some of the things the Old Prune did and it was as if he had read this book. He knew how to read a woman and what to do next. He knew where the sensitive parts were and how to stimulate them. And he had confidence and was easy to relax with.
Back from the Dentist
It was the first time I was with an escort named Trish, a tall well built black woman. I asked her if she ever enjoyed her work with some of her better customers. She said yes she did, but she said that she had been to the dentist that morning and she had been given a lot of pain killers. Although she wasn't feeling any pain, she wasn't feeling anything. Said there was not a chance of an orgasm happening under those circumstances.
I said that I could see where she might think she wasn't going to come, but I think I can do it anyhow. She grinned and said no way. We went into the bedroom. It became a challenge to see if I could do it. The idea turned her on. She took her clothes of, spread her legs and said, "Give it your best shot." Got her off twice. She was impressed.
What worked? I think those pain killers must have not affected the sexual nerves that much. But what worked was the level of sexual trust. I understood she likes sex and would want to come if she could. There was an agreement to try to produce orgasms. My confidence that I could was a big turn on. Then I just followed her clues and her body showed me just what to do.
Candy tries me out
Candy worked at a whorehouse I frequented several years ago. I had seen several women several times and was developing a reputation among the women there. One day I decided to try out Candy who had worked there about a month.
Candy had heard some stories about me. Candy was the kind of girl who liked to have fun. She came into the room and asked me, "Are you really as good as they say you are?" I looked her right in the eye and said, "Yes, I am." She said, "Damn!" and pealed her clothes off and then began helping me get mine off because I wasn't undressing fast enough for her. She grabbed a condom and slipped it on me. She then pushed me down on my back and got on top me and straddled me. She eased herself down on top of me and went wild and got pretty rough. Rougher than I'm use to. In fact for a while I was focusing on not getting hurt. This woman fucked my brains out.
What worked? This is a woman who I had never met who had heard stories about me and the stories excited her. What I did wasn't my own skills because I was on the bottom trying to keep from getting hurt. I could have been anyone and lied about who I was. It could have been you saying you were me. What happened to Candy was totally in her own brain and body. She was ready to fuck and awesome lover and she was told I was awesome. The point is that this orgasm was a mental experience and was dominated by what she was thinking. It demonstrates that if you get a woman in the right frame of mind, she's going to come. It shows the importance of the female brain as a sex organ.
Just Past Virginity
A 19 year old kid loses his virginity. The experience wasn't that impressive. Then he's surfing the web and finds this guide and reads it. The next woman he's with he tries out what I said. He lets her get on top and lets her go at it on top of him. Afterwards, she thinks he's great and all he did was what I suggested. He lay there and did nothing. Just his second time and she's getting off.
This shows the point that women can get themselves off. They are having sex because they want to come. When a woman is on top she can control the motion and fuck herself with your dick just the way she wants to be fucked. All you have to do is stay hard and not mess it up. If a 19 year old on his second time can get a woman off good by doing nothing, you can get a woman off by doing nothing too. It really does work.
And then there's Jenny
Jenny was a doll. She looked like Marsha Brady only more sultry, and had a big grin. Every time we had sex I'd get her off once with my hand. I called it the "warm up orgasm". Usually it took under two minutes to get that first one by hand. I'd usually get about five more after that.
One day she was talking about her ex-husband and that she never even came close in six years to having an orgasm with him, yet I got her off the first time we did it. We started playing around and instead of rubbing he cunt with my hand I just held my fingers together and pressed them against her and held my hand still. She rubbed herself against my unmoving hand and got herself off in under a minute. I pointed out that all I did was hold my hand in one place and not move it and she got off.
Everyone who can have sex is talented enough to hold their hand in one place. That's pretty easy to do. That's too easy! But, yes, I'm telling you that it can actually be that easy. What worked was that Jenny wanted to come and was totally trusting of me sexually. Women are quite capable of getting themselves off as she did against my hand. If the lights were out it could have been anyone's hand. What mattered was that she wanted to get off and was into doing it on my hand.
Her husband always did things wrong. He never got her mind ready. He was always in at some strange angle and never got lined up right. There was not harmonization or synchronization. Sometimes he was pulling her hair or cutting off circulation to her leg. She never felt comfortable with him and there were unresolved issues and general mental strangeness that distracted from the experience. He did a lot of things wrong that distracted her from getting herself off. If he did nothing but hold his hand in one place like I did he would have done more than in all six years of marriage. You can get a woman off doing nothing. You can really get her off doing it right.
Doing it on the Internet and Telephone
Met a woman on the Internet and started exchanging email. Never saw her, and she never saw me. No pictures, just a message with some text. I asked her something about what she thought it might be like getting together. She wrote a few ideas about me coming over, watching a movie, and maybe leading to some kissing.
I picked up on her ideas and wrote back a highly detailed sexual encounter based on what she said. I filled in all the details and created a sexual fantasy of what might happen. The story was long and very erotic and focused on a step by step seduction. She lived 250 miles away. Her response was, "If you leave now you could be here by three. And we can skip the movie."
We never met; we exchanged several more hot email messages and started chatting on the web. The chats were very hot for people who never met. We started calling each other up and having phone sex and enjoyed getting each other to come with just our words.
Most guys can't get women to come in person with someone they are in love with. Here we were total strangers and, with no physical contact at all, getting each other off. This supports my point that it's all in the mind. It was the mental images and her female instincts that got her to come. Since she was physically stimulating herself, she was doing it the way she wanted, and thus the job was being done right. If I were there I would have attempted to learn how she wants to be jacked off so that I would do the same things to her physically that she was doing to herself.
And then there's the trust issue. She had gotten to the point where she trusted me sexually and was open to showing herself off to me. That trust was built on two things. The first is that I was very erotic with her, but very careful to synchronize so that we were doing things together. We had been very open with each other and had gotten familiar. There were no barriers to stop her or mess things up. The second reason there was trust is because we were strangers. In some ways it's easier to trust a stranger because they are not part of your life and are far enough away that it was safe. In this case we were 250 miles apart. I didn't know where she lived. Thus if she got wild with me there wasn't any risk. And because of this there was nothing to prevent us from getting as intimate as we wanted. We just let nature take its course.
Summary / Conclusion
Reviewing some of the key issues presented here
In conclusion, although we males think we know a lot about sex and what women want, the truth is that we don't. Ask any woman on the street and she will tell you that men are clueless. The reason she will tell you that is because men are clueless. Sometimes it amazes me that we haven't become extinct. However, this is the world we live in and that's how things are. But with this book thinks can change.
We men are not only not taught anything about how to be a good lover, most of what we are taught is wrong information. We have learned a massive amount of things about women that are just plain wrong that we not have to unlearn. Fortunately, sex is very simple stuff in general and most of it is getting in touch with our biological roots; to be as good as the average male dog. So there is hope, and, if you actually go out and try the things I suggest in this book you will see immediate an indisputable results.
Here is summary of many of the key concepts
Frequently Asked Questions
Q) Marc, what you're trying to tell me here is that if I follow your advice here and become as good at sex as the average male dog, that I will become a far better lover than I am now?
A) Yes, absolutely, that's exactly what I'm saying.
Q) Are you bullshitting me? Is it really that easy?
A) Yes it is. Try it and you'll see for yourself.
I'm not getting enough sex and still doing research
As you can tell, I liked doing the research and writing this book. I like to fuck. Some day I will be too old and won't be able to fuck anymore so I want to get as much fucking in as possible. There are those who say that I have no more sexual morals as an animal, and that would be an accurate statement. Where we would differ is that I view that as an accomplishment rather than a flaw.
I'm still in Springfield (nowhere) Missouri and I'm still looking to have fun and add to my research. So, if you are a woman and you like what you've read, and you want to know if what I'm saying is for real, feel free to email me. I like doing total strangers and having sex with woman who wants to see how far she can go. If you are into science and want to contribute to the knowledge here, we could have fun discovering new things.
I am also looking for feedback and if you have ideas and suggestions, let me know what you think. I don't cover everything here, but want to add to it.
This work is a copyrighted product of Marc Perkel, 1998-2000. All rights reserved. You may not copy any of this without my permission. You may link to this page for any web site. If anyone want to publish this or make it into a movie or has other ideas on how I can make money with this feel free to contact me. Otherwise read it and enjoy yourself.